My goal when I started this drawing was to keep it simple. I wanted to be one of those people who can describe a face in just 3 or 4 lines.
I failed. I am not one of those people.
My therapist tells me I could never be a detective. She says detectives know that the simplest answer is always the best, but she says I over-complicate things. My friends say I “think too much” or “read too much into things.”
It seems that simplicity is just not my thing!
If you feel trapped, as I have for so long, is it possible that you are both the trapped and the trap?
I was thinking about my friends and why I love them.
In the case of two of them, the main reason I love them (and there are many) is that they are 100% authentic. They have absolutely no pretensions. They never dissemble to make people like them, they don’t fudge the truth, they simply are who they are. And who they are is wonderful.
But maybe who I am is also OK. Maybe I could just be myself. The problem is, I don’t really know who that is.
I have been working in watercolours pretty much exclusively for a while now, but at my life drawing class tonight, I switched things up and used pastels. I’m so glad I did. They say a change is as good as a rest, and my piece was much more interesting than my last few, simply because I broke out and tried something different.
So, in honour of my success, I did today’s selfie in pastels. Not as successful as it could be, but to be honest I am tired and over-committed. I will try to do better tomorrow.
Today’s one-word prompt from WordPress is ‘dilemma.’
I feel if I started writing about that one, I would be here until next year.
Suffice it to say that I started the year with a dilemma and, despite hours of reading and counselling and thinking and talking to friends, I still have the same dilemma.
Today’s drawing was done from memory as my new rescue dog Riley is being very clingy tonight and I didn’t want to leave him to go look in the mirror and draw.
I am 4 weeks into my gym membership and I am really enjoying my time there. I wish I had more time to spend on getting fit but I do what I can. Already I see improvements. And I have found that, since I am motivated by competition, I can motivate myself by competing with my own best performance. So I track how fast I walked/ran 3km, and how fast I cycled 5km, and how heavy the weights are on each machine, and how long I managed to do the crossfit machine before I wanted to collapse!
I would like to get to the point of being able to run a 5k. This seems unreachable at the moment, but I will keep working and see what happens.
The most important thing is that I am focusing on something that is good for me, rather than on something that is not.
I don’t feel as stern as I look in this photo. This is what happens when I try to paint from the mirror. I just find it very hard to get a selfie that expresses anything other than my stern concentration.