I saw my counsellor today, but things went a little differently than normal.
Normally, I go there with an idea in my head of the problem I want to solve. And, without really realizing it, I control the conversation with that in mind.
Today, I felt very down. And I had no purpose in mind for my visit. On the way, I wondered if I should even be going. I had no agenda. Nothing I wanted to achieve. The only reason I didn’t cancel is that it was too close to the time and these sessions are expensive.
So I went in expecting nothing and, as a result, we had a conversation that changed everything. I walked in feeling deeply sad and lost, and I walked out feeling … well, better. Saner. Lighter. More able to cope.
Because I let her in, I gave her a chance to understand me. And she did. She not only understood me – she validated what she saw. She made me feel as though my emotions mattered. She made me feel as though my crazy, over-emotional, empathic, maybe-too-intense, sometimes irrational approach to life was just as valid as anyone else’s.
Which makes me wonder …. what if I started letting other people in?
I’m so very glad you have a good therapist and it sounds like you are working very hard there and well! Sending hugs!
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