I have a tendency to try to ‘people-please.’ I don’t like to be disapproved of. I don’t like to make people unhappy.
Of course, mostly I’m projecting their disapproval or unhappiness, and then reacting to what they think.
Even with this project.
I began to see that I was getting comments meant to cheer me up, because my drawings are mostly not happy ones.
So, instead of sticking to my guns and drawing the reality, I’ve tried to lighten the pictures up, or make excuses when they are not cheery.
The truth is that I am not happy at the moment. And I should be honest about that. Both to myself and in my work.
If it makes anyone uncomfortable or bored, I completely understand. But I feel there’s a reason I had the idea for this project and if I’m dishonest with myself, I will never find out what it is.
So February is the month of honesty. At least visually.